Perks

Mr. Gadget and I have been very pleased with some of the benefits we've received since moving into the 'hood (senior-citizenhood.) There are cheap movies, cheap train tickets, and lots of early-bird dinner specials--just to name a few.

Just the other day we learned of a new one. My computer monitor died, and Mr. Gadget graciously offered to dispose of it. I really love a man who can open jar lids, reach things on high shelves, and who doesn't flinch when faced with having to dispose of dead things.

He called the public works department and was surprised to learn that senior citizens do not have to buy a permit to use the local dump. It's absolutely free. So Mr. G. loaded the expired monitor in his trunk and prepared to leave, although he was a bit apprehensive. This was because of his experience with having to satisfy the aesthetics of the garbage man who refuses to accept garbage that is too smelly, too heavy, too wide, or too loosely tied.
After he got home, I decided to ask him a few questions.

"How was your dump experience?"

"I know people our age generally start having some problems with elimination," he said, "but I had absolutely no problem at all."

"Were the employees dumper-friendly?" I asked.

"Yes." he said. "They directed me right to the e-cycling trailer and told me to lay out my dead monitor in line behind the others."

"Sounds like it was pretty well organized," I said.

"Not only that," he said, "but there was an old guy sitting on a folding chair right next to the trailer. I figure he was there to help the dump babes."

"How would you rate your dump experience?" I asked.

"You mean with 5 being a very satisfying dump experience, and 1 being I'd never do a dump there again?" he asked.

"That seems like a good rating system," I told him.

"I'd give it a 5," he said. "It was an excellent experience and I felt greatly relieved when I left."